Simple Math

By Rina

2001

You'd think that after seventeen years Brian couldn't surprise me any more, but he can.

And it is seventeen years - seventeen years today as a matter of fact.

I can remember the day I first saw him. Hell, if you give me a few minutes, I can probably tell you the exact time I first saw him. God, that's so pathetic. It was algebra, Mr. Hughley's class. Middle of the period; he was explaining the mysteries of 'x'.

I have to laugh at that. If old Mr. Hughley only knew what mysteries of X I've discovered - that Brian's led me to discovering - he'd probably drop dead on the spot.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, seventeen years today and we're still friends. That's pretty fucking amazing when you think about it. I don't know many people who can say that - hell, I can't think of anyone. Families stay together - sort of - but friends come and go. I'm lucky, I have some good ones. Emmett, Ted, Lindsey and Melanie, and Brian. Always Brian.

I love him; have from that first day when I only knew him as the new kid from out of town. Shit, at that point I wasn't even sure I was gay, but I did know that Brian Kinney affected me in a way I'd never felt before.

Seventeen years... We've survived a hell of a lot. His dad, my lack of one, his parents not knowing, my mom's knowing too much, sex (just not with each other), drugs, Justin, David. We never venture too far outside our orbits around each other, so there must be something powerful keeping us together. Maybe it's that mysterious 'x' again. You can never define it, but it's there all the same and things would fall apart without it. Might make a pretty damn good super hero with those powers.

"What's so funny?"

I turn away from the crowded dance floor and grin up at him. "I was just thinking about algebra."

The look he gives me is one I've seen a million times - pained indulgence and affection rolled into one. "I don't even want to know." He takes a drink, tossing back the rest of his beer in a move that displays the clean lines of his neck and torso, something I'm sure he's very aware of. So far no one's caught his attention tonight, but it won't be long in coming, it never is.

"There's your song, Mikey." I hear the beginning of 'Dancing Queen' over the noise of the crowd and whoop, laughing aloud as I head out onto the floor, knowing Brian's right behind me. That for this short moment, he's all mine.

Already grooving to the beat, I turn, and we're moving together. This is something we've done so often it's second nature, that mysterious 'x' letting us know what the other's going to do before they do it. He's all in black, as usual. It's a look other guys try to pull off, but on Brian, it's magic. Instead of vanishing into the shadows, he draws the light to him, until it's like he's glowing.

Okay, I'm getting way too obsessed. Shake it off, shake your ass, enjoy the night. Seventeen fucking years. Even if he doesn't realize it, I do and I'm going to appreciate it.

We're close together, in each other's personal space because of the press of the crowd, but it's not uncomfortable - well, if I was a little drunker, or high, it might be, but right now I'm pretty sober. I can keep my feelings under control.

He dips his fingers into his shirt pocket, bringing out a small plastic bag, and smirks. "Got some good stuff tonight, Mikey." He moves closer to be heard over the noise around us and instinctively I do the same.

"That's what Anita always says," I laugh and shake my head as he tosses a pill into his mouth, dry swallowing it. "And tomorrow morning you'll be bitching that she gave you crap again."

He places another pill on his tongue, giving me that challenging look that's gotten me into so much trouble in the past. I can't resist it though, and I have to admit that life would have been a hell of a lot more boring if I'd never seen that particular glint in his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'll be bitching to." Brian leans in and our lips meet, his tongue gliding against mine as we trade possession of the drug. His hands close on my shoulders as mine move to his arms and we rest our foreheads together, eyes closed, blocking out the rest of the world. Our orbits decay, drawn into the weight of our shared past and the black hole of our future. I wish we could stay like this forever, bound together by the power of 'x'.

I feel his body tense and start to draw back, stopping when his grip tightens. "Algebra. Remember Mr. Hughley?"

Okay, there's something I didn't expect.

"I remember him opening up your notebook and finding that PlayGirl picture in it, if that's what you're talking about." Where is he going with this? And do I really want to know?

"Hmm, I'd forgotten about that. I was just thinking about his class. God, that was a long time ago."

"Yeah, forever. We're fucking ancient."

"Speak for yourself, I'm never getting old." 

"Sure, whatever you say, Peter Pan. Few more years and we'll both be kicked out of here to make room for a crop of fresh young things." This time I do pull back and grin at him, then raise my eyebrows at his expression. Brian rarely does serious, it's there on the list of things to avoid like love and repeat tricks - Justin excluded as much as I hate to admit it. Brian does sarcastic, also condescending and wired, but serious... That's something I usually only see when he's got something on his mind he doesn't want to deal with.

He stares at me and I want to find out what he's thinking, but the E's kicking in and I can't take it. I start to laugh. "What? Worried they're going to come do it now?"

The smirk is back. If I could, I'd smack myself for losing the moment.

"If they did, you'd go before me."

I lift my middle finger in response, but his attention is already beginning to move elsewhere.

Brian Kinney has entered hunting mode, all others please leave the building or prepare to be fucked. He spots his prey and smiles, that sensual, calculating expression that I've never been on the receiving end on.

"Talk to you tomorrow," I call, turning to push through the crowds, going in search of Emmett or Ted, or maybe in someone who might be interested, slim as those chances might be.

"Mikey."

I look back over my shoulder at him. "Yeah?" That's weird, once on target, he never deviates from it.

He looks confused, and shrugs - obviously, the E's hitting him too. "Talk to you tomorrow."

And then he's off, the hunter in his element. In record time he's bagged his trick. The guy never even knew what hit him, but he will soon.

I lean against the railing, watching, just like usual. Seventeen years and sometimes he can still surprise me.

Only thing is, most of the time he doesn't. Guess the mysterious 'x' only has so much power after all, even after this long.

END

   since 02-04-07

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